Conventions
When you’ve worked your whole adult life as an actor, you’re a member of all the unions, have a complicated personal life that doesn’t allow you to leave home for long stretches of time, live in Wisconsin — where there isn’t a lot of union work as an actor, making it hard to make a living — and if you have been fortunate enough to be associated with a few jobs that linger in the public consciousness, one of the things you do, or find yourself doing, is saying yes when invited to a convention, where people come and pay money for autographs and pictures of people deemed to be celebrities. I was a Hirogen Medic in two episodes of Star Trek Voyager. I wore about 50 pounds of foam from head to foot, lost 15 pounds of water weight from sweating inside that foam for ten days, smelled like that sweat and the sweat from all the seven-foot-tall actors that had worn the foam before me but had perished in one conflict or another. The Star Trek people did not want to spend the money to make new costumes, so when they ran out of seven-foot-tall actors to play Hirogens, they just folded the foam over and pinned it up and slammed it on you. There are many people who are so well-versed in Star Trek-ia that they will pay a couple of sawbucks for the autograph and picture of even a lowly Hirogen Medic. I also did a movie about college fraternities that was and still is quite popular. I played an occasionally recurring role on Seinfeld. I dated Elaine, took her to my villa in Tuscany and played pool with Kramer and George’s Dad in their basement at a very small pool table. I wore boxer shorts in that one and conducted the Brooklyn Policeman’s Benevolent Society Orchestra with a bent baton. And then there is the vampire. Primarily because of these adventures, and a few less popular but still known performances, I am asked, occasionally, to go to these conventions, where I am treated like a celebrity. It’s nice. The attention is nice. The fantasy of being well known and liked by strangers is nice. The money is nice, especially lately. And the chance to get out of town, sometimes to very nice locations like London or Florida, is also nice. But you earn it sitting at a table for an average of six hours a day for three days, smiling and being nice, telling stories, answering questions, shaking hands, hugging for pictures, being nice and smiling. It is fun most of the time, but it is also confusing. And it’s work. I once talked to a man for almost half an hour. Answered questions, told stories, asked questions, listened to stories. After about 25 minutes it became apparent that he wasn’t going to buy an autograph, so I asked him straight out. I think I embarrassed him so he plunked down 20 dollars and […]
May 8th, 2009 by Mark Metcalf
The World is in the Turlet
The end result was entirely inappropriate for my situation. The song prophesied humorously the end of the world: Hipsters dropping dead on the streets of New York, rivers boiling and food supplies running dangerously low. The chorus especially resonated with my state of mind as the band growled “The world is in the turlet/ The world is in the turlet/ The world is in the turlet and we’re all gonna die.”
May 8th, 2009 by Nick Schurk
2009 Italian Film Fest Hits Milw, Free Screenings May 9-10
Award winning films from Italy.
May 8th, 2009 by Howie Goldklang
Friday Photos Friday, 08. May 2009
Zilber Hall Eckstein Hall Pabst Brewing Co. Bottling Department The Brewery The North End
May 8th, 2009 by Dave Reid
Bad trips and flashbacks
Dear Ken, It must have been nice to return to your hometown — good ol’ Pittsburgh, PA — and come away with another sweep of the Pirates. I could sense in your Tuesday post-game press conference that you were saddened by the dire state of baseball in the Steel City. I too felt bad watching on TV. The sparse attendance (both games drew under 9,000) took me back to the sad, dark days of Milwaukee baseball. That’s right, Ken. Things were pretty bad here at one time, not very long ago. If I close my eyes and focus real hard, I can fight the repression and travel back to when the Brewers were just as shitty, if not worse, than the Pirates … … The era of Wendy Selig-Prieb low-budget ball. When Bob Wickman was our lone all-star representative because they had to pick somebody. When our best hitter was an Australian catcher. When we’d get excited for Jeff D’Amico’s turn in the rotation. Or Cal Eldred’s. Because Ben McDonald was on the DL. Before the roof, sitting frozen-assed on damp chairs in April, the smell of mildew emitting from the rotting cushions in the “luxury seats;” watching Scott Karl get shelled by the Royals, waiting for Angel Miranda to come in and walk a few batters, as sprinkles turn to drizzle then frozen rain, prompting a walk under the bleachers to visitor’s bullpen with some dudes from the JV baseball team to heckle Mackey Sasser as he warms up Hipolito Pichardo, who then strikes out Jeromy Burnitz (swinging, throws bat) then Jose Hernandez (looking, best pitch of the AB) in the bottom half of the inning. A 162-game cycle of frustration–depression–bargaining–denial–acceptance, halted only by football season … But it’s better now. Got a nice stadium, an invested ownership, talented ballplayers under contract — things are looking OK. Some of us could use some more reassurance though. Steve at the Decider thinks Ryan Braun is destined to pull a Molitor after his contract is up in 2016. It’s a “High Fidelity” thing — are you a John Cusack fan? He’s probably right, but that’s not to say we can’t pimp him out for some prospects. In the age of Brett Favre, you gotta expect heartbreak, not pine over it. Am I right? Nobody’s got the Robin Yount mentality any more. It’s a bygone just like those plastic-y blue belts from the ’80’s. Things are firing on all cylinders for you, Ken. A four-game winning streak. A chain of quality starts from your rotation. A healthy Ryan Braun, and a confident J.J. Hardy breaking out of his slump. You got Rickie Weeks hitting clutch home runs, and Mike Cam’ron is on pace to set career-highs in every offensive category. Aside from a slip by Carlos Villanueva, the pen has been solid — if Trevor Hoffman’s psych-out tactics were any more effective, hitters would be swallowing their tongue on the way back to the dugout. Things couldn’t be much better. Keep it up! Best Regards, Adam Lovinus
May 7th, 2009 by Adam Lovinus
The speed of life
The average person takes in 3000 advertising messages per day. That’s just unsolicited ad messaging; it doesn’t even include texts, tweets, Facebook updates, emails or normal business dialogue. Plus, that stat is from 2007, meaning it's completely outdated. On a side note: Does anyone remember writing papers in high school using a bibliography page? You know the one, filled with books published in 1982 and still thought to be relevant?
May 7th, 2009 by Michelle Sieg
Reception for Consul General of France
Reception for Consul General of France Tuesday, June 9 at 4 p.m. Alliance Française, 1800 E. Capitol Drive, Shorewood A reception will be held for M. Jean-Baptiste Main de Boissière, Consul General of France in Chicago, to meet people from the Milwaukee community. The reception will be at the Alliance Francaise de Milwaukee, 1800 E. Capitol Drive in Shorewood. For more information, please call 414.964.3855.
May 7th, 2009 by Erin Donohoe
48 Hour Film Fest in WI and Beyond
The 48 Hour Film Fest rumbles into Milwaukee June 5-7, with dates popping up all over the Third Coast so ready, steady, go!
May 7th, 2009 by Howie Goldklang
Milwaukee the Water Capital?
The single most important expansion of the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee currently underway is the proposed School of Freshwater Sciences.
May 7th, 2009 by Dave Reid
Boulevard Theatre’s “Stations of the Cross”
Written by local writer, actor and storyteller Beth Monhollen, Boulevard Theatre's Stations of the Cross follows the traditional 'stations' of Jesus suffering as told through monologues and short scenes about the restaurant service industry. Often witty and occasionally dark, Cross provides many, many laughs and insights into human behavior.
May 6th, 2009 by Russ Bickerstaff
Downer Avenue Development Project Heats Up Again
This past Monday night a public meeting was held to discuss possible streetscape improvements to Downer Avenue.
May 6th, 2009 by Dave Reid
A fairytale of jelly and betrayal
My name is Henry O. Lundstrom, and I regret to say I’m spending my last moments on earth upside down in a big batch of dough.
May 6th, 2009 by Stella Cretek
