The Legend of Bob Marley
May 11 marks the 28th anniversary of legendary reggae musician Bob Marley’s death. For many people, Marley’s music offered a strong opposition to hatred, oppression and neo-colonialism. But for those with an unfortunately limited worldview, the musician was nothing more than the patron saint of weed.
To illustrate the second stance, I’ve decided to turn this playlist over to my cousin, Ryan Schurk. Ryan is a former day-shift manager at the Grafton Costco who lost his job after an ill-fated attempt to turn a defective Slap Chop into a bong. At age 26, he currently lives with my aunt Gina and spends his days blowing smoke in the ear of his family’s cat, Tuff Gong, in an attempt to get him high. Ryan was kind enough to sit down and share five songs with ThirdCoast Digest that he feels are appropriate to commemorate Marley’s life.
Sixto Rodriguez – “Sugar Man”
I first heard Sixto’s album Cold Fact on a high school service trip to South Africa. I knew right away that it was something special. It’s a shame the R-Man never caught fire in the US. “Sugar Man” has got all the hooks of a Donovan jam, but cuts out the bullshit and directly professes love to my “Sweet Mary Jane.”
When I got back to the states, I knew that my life finally had purpose. Cold Fact single handedly convinced me to forego “higher education” and devote all my efforts to being a full-time dude. Was it the right decision? You think that over while you eat your panini on your paid lunch hour. Meanwhile, I’ll be watching an all-day “Cheaters” marathon on G4.
The Rolling Stones – “2,000 Light Years from Home”
Their Satanic Majesties Request is probably my third favorite Stones album of all time. Whether I’m kicking around town trying to break in a new pair of mules or playing bag toss at my pal Moose’s duplex, there’s no better soundtrack than this underappreciated psych-rock gem.
Sometimes I’ll throw “2,000 Light Years from Home” on when Tuff Gong and I are going on one of our “spirit journeys.” Before we know it, we’re tearing through the cosmos on big-ass Harleys in a mad dash to liberate the people of Space Station Zion from the dreaded Downpressor Men. The song’s spacey-synth is like something out of a sci-fi flick, and we’re frickin’ Jedi masters. The only difference: Once our job is done we score some “death sticks” and spit game at those sweet Twi’Lek honeys.
I’ve never taken a ride on the white pony before, unless you count that nummer I did with the guys from the Costco TV department. Still, I think I know where Ghost and Raekwon are coming from with this song. I’ve dangled my fair share of God’s green herb, and I can tell you that the life of a kingpin isn’t easy. Shariff don’t like it when a small businessman such as myself starts climbing the ladder.
Sorry, Officer Buzzkill. I guess there’s a law in this country that says a guy can’t do what he’s gotta do to pay the bills. I mean, weed’s an au naturale thing, straight from the fields that have been tilled by my proletariat brethren. Had I not been pushing my product on that middle school marching band, who knows what kind of junk they would have gotten into? I like to think that my services are the only thing keeping the youth of America from speed balling or huffing airplane glue. And you know what’s worse? After Gina bailed me out the pigs didn’t even give me back my inventory! That’s harsh.
Fugazi – “Nightshop”
I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t know too much about these guys, but if this song refers to what I think it does, then Ian McKaye and Fugazi are hardcore punk’s answer to The Wailers. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to visit the “Nightshop” myself. One time I thought I heard the cops trying to break down my front door. Turns out that I had left the TV on upstairs and The Shining was playing on TCM, but by the time I made the connection (well over an hour later) I had already flushed my stash.
Lucky for me my boy Seth runs a late-night side business at the BP Station on the corner of Dank and Wasted (actual address redacted, sorry all you fiends out there). Long story short, within 25 minutes I was fully restocked and ready to enjoy a hot slice of ‘za courtesy of my good friend the Red Barron. Next time you’re at a Fugazi show, make sure to fire up a spliff with Ian and the boys to thank them for honoring the hardworking ladies and gents who pull the graveyard shift and keep a guy like me on an even keel.
MC5 – “Motor City Is Burning”
If you’re anything like me, you started salivating the moment you laid eyes on MC5’s Kick Out the Jams Anthology. That big, beautiful leaf on the cover just screams “The Five know how to get down!” And that’s exactly what they do on “Motor City is Burning.” This greasy groove is a must-hear for anyone who wants to achieve the title of Party Master General.
“Ya know, the Motor City is burning babe/ there ain’t a thing in the world that they can do.” Yeah man, I bet Motor City is burning … burning something that rhymes with “rubies.” Me and my band, Ry Guy & the Edward Furlong Murder Mystery, are writing a really similar song called “Grafton City Nights (Puff, Puff, Passout).” It’s got the same wandering bass line as its inspirational source, and the only “vocals” are from the boys and me as we blow some sweet kine bud smoke into the mic.
