Smackdowns and close calls
Bout recap by Rob Vosters
March’s St. Patrick’s Day-themed bouts — aka “The Shamrock Smackdown” — featured the undefeated Rushin’ Rollettes squaring off against the upstart Shevil Knevils and the winless (but by no means hopeless) Crazy 8’s taking on Maiden Milwaukee. Playoff seedings were on the line for each team, which translated into two of the most competitive bouts of the season.
The Rollettes skated through a porous Shevil defense en route to a quick 10-1 lead before probable rookie of the year, Skittle, gave the Shevils a fighting chance. Each team’s defense began to gel midway through the first half, which slowed down the scoring and intensified the physicality. Methodical and grinding jams by the Rollettes could only be matched by the fast scoring abilities of the Shevil’s wildcard, Skittle, until two Shevil penalties allowed Heidi Voltage to break the game open near halftime with a 24-point jam. At the half, the score was Rollettes 47, Shevils 29.
The second half picked up where the first left off as the Rollettes’ talented jammer HackSAW simply overpowered the Shevils with her speed and agility. Keeping the score close for the Shevils was the ever-reliable Skittle and her teammate, Fehmeldahyde, who cut the Rollette’s lead to 61-45 with ten minutes remaining. Match up after match up yielded only low point jams that kept the Rollettes solidly in the lead. Down by 19 points and with only seconds remaining in the bout, Skittle and the Shevils pulled off an amazing 20 point jam to dramatically snatch victory from the Rollettes, 71-70.
Maiden Milwaukee 88, Crazy 8’s 80
The Crazy 8’s brought their physical brand of derby justice to the Maidens early, slowing down the pace of the Maidens and keeping the score low in the first half. The physical play of the 8’s Abba Zabba was a bit too rough for the refs, leading to her early exit in the first half. But that didn’t stop the 8’s from slowing down the Maidens for most of the first half before a late grand slam by the Maiden’s Slayerah gave them a 32-29 heading into halftime.
The second half was a complete reversal of the first as both teams traded high scoring jams like they were Pogs. Rejected Seoul clawed her way through teammates and 8’s for 14 points. Zotay countered with a 20 point jam that pulled the 8’s within two points with nine minutes to go, 69-67. And then the physical, grind-it-out play of the first half returned, only this time it was the Maidens protecting their vulnerable lead. Beelzebelle delivered a strategic wallop to Sharkira, limiting her jam to only four points. Just as it appeared this bout could be decided in the final jam, too, the 8’s neglected to use their final timeout and the Maidens elected to run out the clock and claim a hard-fought 88-80 victory.
The Rollettes, Shevils and Maidens all ended the regular season with identical 2-1 records, while the always-in-it 8’s were 0-3. But every team’s still in it for the playoffs on Saturday, April 10 when the Rushin’ Rollettes will face the Crazy 8’s and the Shevils will battle the Maidens.
As always, Dr. Awkward and Gloria Hole give us the inside scoop on everything — both on and off the track.
