Dear Ken Macha

Ransom! (23-14)

By - May 18th, 2009 11:02 am


Dear Ken Macha,

Superb job, Ken! The number of losses in the subject line of this letter hasn’t changed from 14 all week. That’s quite the impressive fact considering the Pirates were the only team you’d swept until the Marlins came to town. Not only did you sweep them, you scared the living shit out of them!

When the Marlins’ players weren’t huddled together in their beds because of the ghost of Charles Pfister, they were serving up homeruns to Prince Fielder and save situations to Trevor Hoffman.  As easy as this series might look on paper, the Crew actually came from behind in two of the three games. I’m sure your calm demeanor, skillful managerial decisions and interesting anecdotes about playing baseball in Canada kept your team focused, Ken. Everyone loves a good Olympic Stadium anecdote.

What everyone doesn’t love is dickish behavior by fans. Not only were the Marlins spooked on and off the diamond, but even their moral victories, such as LF Chris Coghlan’s first career homerun, were stained by the negotiation tactics of one Brewer fan. This “fan” went so far as to request tickets for a Yankees-Marlins series, the signature of the only popular Marlin (Hanley Ramirez) and the coup de grace: a photo with his negotiation victim, Chris Coghlan.  The fan justified it by explaining that he doesn’t make as much as the players he tries to exploit.

You’ve been involved in baseball for all of your life, Ken, so I’m sure you’ve noticed the antipathy a lot of fans express towards players based on the higher salaries they receive nowadays.  The game is a massive money-maker and it’s players the main entertainment, so why shouldn’t the players benefit?  Nevertheless, it’s always a little confusing when they’re expressing this feeling while attending a game — at that point, it’s a little too late for complaints, buddy! Am I right, Ken?

While those fans are just lashing out at their lack of control in a world that’s moving faster than they want, your team is in complete control of the NL Central after plucking the Cardinals over the weekend.  If you can untuck once more on Monday night, you’ll be able to add another team to the Sweep Board you keep next to the How To Work Like A Cat calendar  in your office.

Not everything is, wait for it… purrfect with your team, though, Ken.  Rickie Weeks tweeked his wrist on Sunday, which means Craig Counsell will be dumping grit all over the diamond until Rickie can return.  You’ll see a marked decrease in power from Craig, but at least he gets on base.  Plus, his, wait for it… cat-like reflexes will come in handy at second base.

I’m all out of cat puns and righteous indignation at crappy fans, Ken, so I’ll let you get back to enjoying cosmopolitan St. Louis.  Let’s get the sweep in the Lou before we tangle with the hapless Astros!

Best Regards,

Rob Vosters

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