27 a.m.

So on Monday four of us from the office went for a free lunch at Bravo! It’s a new “Italian” place in Bayshore Mall’s soon-to-be-unveiled shopping village. The restaurant itself was passable, with economically-priced entrees of biblical proportions and $6 desserts. The staff was “practicing,” which meant thousands of people got invitations for a complimentary meal over three days, to help the staff get the kinks out before the real opening in a few weeks. Except for the fact that the server didn’t take my order first (I was the only female at the table and we had a comment card with which Charlie was judiciously keeping score) and the manager completely interrupted us to give his spiel, it was fine. If I ever get tired of waiting in line for a table at Maggiano in Mayfair I’ll consider Bravo! an option.

What was really interesting (and a little disturbing) about the whole experience, though, had little to do with fake Roman columns abutting black-painted, acoustic tile ceilings. It was the shopping village itself that both fascinated and frightened us. Hundreds of workers in hard hats scurried about, frantically putting the finishing touches on storefronts, landscaping and street dressing in what appeared to be a desperate attempt to be open by holiday shopping season. And wow, I do believe this will be a one-of-a-kind retail experience for most of us Milwaukeeans. Ever been to the city of Kohler? How about Disney World? On a cruise ship? The new Bayshore has exactly that feel. It’s a city within a city, complete with street signs, sidewalks, condos(!) and a town square where school groups and jazz acts will no doubt entertain shoppers as they spend their way through the plaza. I bet there will be greeters in blazers to help us find our way around and to let us know what exciting retail events are on tap for the day. I wouldn’t even be surprised if some sort of card program is in the offing, where you can just charge away on your Bayshore card and get one convenient bill in the mail at a later date!

Needless to say, we didn’t litter or take pictures. We had no desire to have some guy in a cartoon animal suit quietly escort us to an underground holding area for questioning. No, we certainly didn’t want to share the fate of the two young women being escorted out of Kohl’s in handcuffs as we hit the parking ramp. Hopefully they were just shoplifting and hadn’t tried to pull the head off Bayshore Bear, the mall’s shopping mascot.