2008-07 Vital Source Mag – July 2008
On Assignment
Or: Getting entertained to death in Branson, MO Yakov Smirnoff – of early ‘80s “In Soviet Union, car drives YOU!” fame – is currently fighting a losing battle against a mob of bloodthirsty, dancing pirates. Overwhelmed, he swings a plastic sword wildly through the air as he’s driven ever closer to the edge of the stage. “Oh no!” he cries. “I think we’re in for an adventure!” I’m sitting in the Yakov Smirnoff Theater in Branson, Missouri. Hundreds of semi-conscious senior citizens with pants up to their necks fill the seats around me, applauding every Russian themed dance number and crusty joke about the differences between men and women (men and toilet seats: when will they ever learn?). I’m applauding along with them, and it isn’t until the show’s climax – in which Smirnoff serenades and subsequently waltzes with the Statue of Liberty – that the big question finally hits me: What the hell am I doing here? Yakov Smirnoff: He’s not dead yet The armadillo, the mayor, and the ghost Branson sits astride the shores of Lake Taneycomo in the middle of the Ozarks, 40 miles north of the Arkansas border. A self-described “Family-Friendly Las Vegas,” it’s home to a ridiculous number of theaters and attractions that cater almost exclusively to the geriatric set: Dolly Parton’s Dixie Stampede, Dick Clark’s American Bandstand Theater, The Roy Rogers-Dale Evans Museum. Andy Williams, Bobby Vinton and the surviving members of Bill Haley’s Comets are among Branson’s red-hot celebrity fixtures, along with Mel Tillis, Ann-Margaret, and yes, Yakov “What a country!” Smirnoff. In addition to these highlights, Branson also contains plenty of standard tourist-trap fare: Hollywood wax museums, haunted houses, miles and miles of biblical-themed motels. To make a useful local comparison, Branson is a lot like Wisconsin Dells, only with fewer water parks and more theaters owned by the Oak Ridge Boys. For reasons unclear, I’ve been sent to Branson to cover its annual Summertime in the Ozarks Festival. Accompanied once again by VITAL’s own Amy Elliott, my assignment is open-ended and my angle unclear: should I write about how ridiculous this place will almost surely be? Should I look for something deeper, a hidden side to Branson rarely seen or discussed? Should I just say “fuck it” and check out the Red Skelton tribute show? In the end, I manage to come up with a half-baked notion that no matter what, I should attempt to shield our adventures with the least amount of protective irony as possible; I want to be truly entertained. And in a town that counts Tony Orlando as one of its main selling points, that’s a tall order. We arrive on a Thursday morning, bleary and caffeine-shaky from a grueling 10-hour drive through the night. After grabbing a quick breakfast at the Farmhouse Café (I order a cheese omelet, which arrives – topped as promised – with two melted Kraft Singles) and checking into our rooms at the brand-new Hilton Convention Center (an elderly doorman claims some […]
Jul 1st, 2008 by Matt Wild
Stars and Stripes Forever
My kids are growing up, and as they get older, I believe it’s increasingly important to educate them about their duties as citizens. I worry about the ignorance of Americans of their own history, from the framing of the Constitution to why we go to war with other nations. In anticipation of Independence Day, I sat down with my kids to see what they already knew and what was left to teach. I taped it all and some of it is below. As always, they amazed me with their honesty and their interest in the world around them. Try it with your own kids soon. You’ll probably be amazed, too. ON FLAGS: LENA: You have to stand up for the color guard. ME: Why? L: You have to honor them, the soldiers that fought for us. EMMA: They already honored us by fighting, and we have to honor them back. It’s a circle. ME: What else do you know about honoring the flag? L: It can’t ever touch the ground! ME: Right. It’s considered disrespectful. L: When Grandpa Allen died, they had a flag over his coffin. E: Then they folded up and gave it to Grandma Margaret. ME: What else do you know about flags? L: Ooh! I know! If it’s raining out, you take it down. E: And you take it down at night. JEFFREY: Why at night does it have to come down? L: So no one steals it! ME: No. Flag etiquette says it should only fly during daylight. So, do you guys know what happens when someone important dies? ALL KIDS: -blank stares- ME: They fly the flag at half-mast. That means only part-way up the flag pole. It’s a sign of respect for the person who died. L: If I was important and I died, I would want the flag to fly way up there for me! I would want a second flagpole stacked on top and then someone to sit up there and keep that flag safe! VOTING: J: I like going with you to vote. ME: Why? J: You like to vote. And I like it when you’re happy. E: I like going with you because it’s pretty amazing to see all of the people who just come to our school to vote. It makes me feel so proud to see everyone out voting. CIVIL DISOBEDIENCE: L: What’s it called when people are upset with the government and they show up in a group so the government knows? E: Protesting. ME: Yep. Sometimes it’s called demonstrating or marching. L: We don’t always march. You could hold a big sign that says what you believe, or make up a chant and chant it really loud. ME: That’s your responsibility as a citizen of this country. You need to tell the government in peaceful ways when you don’t agree with them. People don’t have this right in every country. THE PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE: ME: When you started fourth grade, you wanted to know what […]
Jul 1st, 2008 by Lucky Tomaszek
Red, White & Bleu
The French celebrate their independence in July, just like us – on the 14th, the anniversary of the day the peasants stormed the Bastille and raided its cache of weapons. Their banner, like ours, is red, white and blue, colors that stand for liberty, equality, and fraternity, the ideals of the French Revolution. Taste Chef Frakes’ tribute to both cultures at his demonstration at Bastille Days on Saturday, July 12 at 2 pm. VS WHITE DONUT PEACH BEIGNETS, RED BEAUJOLAIS SYRUP & BLUEBERRY SMASH The Pfister Hotel 424 E. Wisconsin Ave., Milwaukee 414-273-8222 Brian Frakes, a Brookfield native, moved to West Palm Beach at the age of twelve. He majored in Psychology at Florida State University while launching what would be a distinguished career in hospitality as a dishwasher. Once finding his true calling, Frakes learned to cook under talented chefs in Florida and Los Angeles. It was The Pfister Hotel, and the fact that his family had moved back to Milwaukee, that drew him home again. “I was always proud of where I came from and The Pfister is clearly Milwaukee’s flagship property. It’s one of only 400 rated as a ‘Preferred Hotel’ in the world,” he says. Here’s a red, white and “bleu” play on the classic beignet. Stone fruits are back in season and donut peaches are among the best. Whip up this simple fritter batter the day before and have fresh donuts in the morning with your coffee! For donut peach beignets 2 c flour 2 T sugar 2 t baking powder ½ t salt 2 T powdered milk 1 t cinnamon 2 eggs each ½ c water 2 c roasted donut peaches, diced 2 T corn oil 2 T powered sugar Combine all dry ingredients, then add wet ingredients in a mixer and blend. Do not overwhip. Chill in refrigerator for at least an hour. Deep fry generous spoonfuls of dough in hot oil until golden brown (about 4 minutes). Sprinkle with powdered sugar. Red Beaujolais Syrup 1 c Beaujolais Nouveau ½ c white balsamic vinegar 2 T brown sugar ¼ vanilla bean Combine ingredients in a saucepan and heat until reduced by 2/3. Set aside to cool. Drizzle sauces over beignets and enjoy! Blueberry Smash 1 c blackberries 1 c blueberries 1/3 c sugar 3 T Grand Marnier Combine blackberries & blueberries with sugar in a sauté pan and heat on medium heat until sugar caramelizes. Drizzle in Grand Marinier and set aside to cool. GOUGERES (CHEESE PUFFS) Geneviève Leplae came to America from Vesoul, a small town east of Dijon. Now retired from teaching French at Berlitz and the Alliance Francaise, she recalls her heritage with this traditional Burgundian snack that can be made ahead and served later. A widow with five children, her oldest daughter, Anne Herisson-Leplae, is the Director of the Alliance Francaise of Milwaukee. 1 recipe Choux Paste: 1 c sifted all-purpose flour ½ c water ½ c milk 8 T butter, cut in small pieces ½ t salt 4 […]
Jul 1st, 2008 by Cate Miller
Dead Man’s Carnival
Photos by Kat Berger + Lynn Allen (Black Sheep Photography) The circus has a long, romantic history in Wisconsin. The seven dashing Ringling brothers held their first circus in Baraboo in 1884, and the town remained their headquarters and wintering grounds until 1917. The site is now the Circus World Museum. Fast forward to 2008: the circus arts are dead, replaced with Nintendo Wii and flat screen TVs. Right? Wrong! Who is carrying on this ancient art? Bing! You win a cigar, kiddo. It’s Dead Man’s Carnival, a daring and different group of performers who shake together the old and the new, ultimately rendering classic Americana: a beautiful jazz siren with a nose ring, throwing flames. “A lot of these skits are a hundred years old,” says member Gypsy Geoff. “We just put our own spin on it.” A LIGHT BULB FOR ZERO THE CLOWN Gene – Zero the Clown – stands on the stage, wrapped in heavy chains. Erik Bang approaches with a wicked-looking tazer and applies it to the metal links. Gene thrashes, and Erik sticks a light bulb in his mouth. It lights up, and the audience cheers. Gene does fire performance, juggling, and comedy sketches with lots of costume changes. He was influenced by groups he saw at Burning Man Festival that mixed traditional sideshow fare with modern influences. These small circus groups have been popping up all over the country and Gene wanted to do something similar in Milwaukee. As he became involved with fire performance troupe Arson Etiquette and local juggling groups, he started to network with other performers. Last summer, Gene and his friend Ryan Aschebrook started booking sexy circus shows at Club ? called “Karnal:Ville.” The saucy show mixed traditional circus acts with sex toys and burlesque. The group gained a following, mostly because they were offering something different to do on a Saturday night. After a few shows, Aschebrook moved on. The group changed their name to Dead Man’s Carnival and Gene took on much of the scheduling and stage managing for the group. I ask him what the appeal of the circus is for him. He wears a suit coat over a gray button-up shirt; his clothes and posture give him the character of a magician. “It’s a medium that pursues a mixture of arts you wouldn’t necessarily get in another framework. It’s very flexible for doing everything your heart desires. That and the stripes. The striped clothing appeals to me.” He also cites the audience reaction as one of his favorite parts of performance – and there is a reaction. At a recent show I witnessed laughter, cheering, wolf-whistling, hooting, eyes covered in pain and even a few protests and disgusted mutterings. Gene (Zero the Clown) THE SURREAL YARD SALE In May, two of the carnival’s performers, Pinky and Erik Bang, had a rummage sale. It wasn’t your typical knickknacks, toasters and old dishes. The spread included juggling pins, swords for swallowing, eccentric suits, a bucket of raccoon bones […]
Jul 1st, 2008 by Tea Krulos
Earlimart
Must a band be loud to be heard? Or exceedingly different to be noticed? Must the middle ground be mediocre? L.A. duo Earlimart’s sixth full-length release, Hymn and Her, a string of twelve easy and modest indie rock songs, has the answer: it’s lovely, for once, not to have to stare directly into the sun of a band’s persona. In fact, lack of personality creates an odd wall of detachment. The lyrics are introspective, but in a distanced philosophical sense, not a messy emotional one. “We’re much more than that/But for now it’s a deathtrap,” bassist Ariana Murray sings of allowing a rocky relationship to breathe on “Before it Gets Better.” It’s wise and cool-headed; the band values breakups and let downs as occasions for personal rediscovery. Thematically, returning “home” is the heart of the disc. The tambourine-pulsed “Logically Follow” is a favorite and the second of three tracks where Murray’s earthy vocals aren’t just harmony. Earlimart’s other half, guitarist Aaron Espinoza, leads the rest, despite a tendency to sound a little sloppy (“For the Birds”) or too much like Elliott Smith (“God Loves You the Best”). But really, that’s nitpicking. The production is subtle and elegant, with piano, organ, and viola intensifying interest and structure throughout. Hymn and Her is ideal for a leisurely, windows-down summer drive, but as the price of gas rises (and given the likely advice of introverts Espinoza and Murray), this release is better suited for winding down with a drink on your living room sofa.
Jul 1st, 2008 by Amber Herzog
Icy Demons
By Kyle Shaffer An open-door policy in a musical project seems is an obvious catalyst for experimentation. But when that collective implements an initiation process – involving alter egos – all your circuit-bent guitar pedals and Godspeed You Black Emperor! albums may not prepare you for what you’re about to experience. That’s the idea behind Icy Demons’ latest, Miami Ice, as the group challenges listeners to journey into poppy experimentalism as opposed to experimental pop. Chris Powell (aka PowPow) and Griffin Rodriguez (aka Blue Hawaii) are the group’s founders, though no one really appears to be at the wheel of the project. A slew of guest artists, including Tortoise guitarist Jeff Parker, make up the supporting cast on this trippy, unpredictable release. Icy Demons hit their stride amidst quirky, repetitive melodies a la Broken Social Scene on “Spywatchers” and “1850,” making use of everything from cello riffs to vintage keyboard sounds. And while the title track hints at pop immediacy, the songs keep shifting in the neo-prog/jazz of opener “Buffalo Bill” and the lounge room sway of “Summer Samba”. Were it not for the spacey time shifts and alien synth lines, Miami Ice might almost sound terrestrial. But this album may as well be the soundtrack to a robot-only sex party or Martians shooting up heroin. There’s certainly something to be said for the ingenuity and left-field antics that run amok on this release – it just may not be translatable in any earthly tongue.
Jul 1st, 2008 by Vital Archives
