A day at the movies

Whip It is a charming new movie about falling in love with roller derby. Our hometown roller derby heroes, The Brewcity Bruisers were out in force on Friday, Oct. 2 for the   local premiere at Marcus Theatres Ridge Cinemas. They were busy handing out flyers for their upcoming season and showing solidarity with their silver-screen counterparts.

The movie, directed by Drew Barrymore, tells the story of Bliss Cavender, played by Juno star Ellen Page. It is based on the young adult novel Derby Girl by Shauna Cross.

Bored with her mother’s insistence that she devote her energy to beauty pageants, and also bored with her boring suburban life in Austin, TX, Bliss has a life-changing moment when she spots a flyer for a Texas Roller Derby bout. After tryouts, Bliss becomes fresh meat for the last place Hurl Scouts. She chooses the derby name Babe Ruthless and joins teammates Drew Barrymore as the spacey Smashley Simpson, Eve as Rosa Sparks, Kristen Wiig as Maggie Mayhem, stuntwoman Zoe Bell as Bloody Holly and real-life L.A. Derby Dolls stars Kristen Adolfi and Rachel Piplica as the Manson Sisters (in a wink to the famous Hansen brothers from Slap Shot).

In other notable roles, Juliette Lewis (who should have had a name like Mallory Knox-Her-Socks-Off) appears as the sinister Iron Maven of the Holy Rollers. Corndog Jimmy Fallon appears as the Texas Roller Derby announcer. Andrew Wilson, the lesser-known acting brother to Luke and Owen, plays the Hurl Scouts beset manager called Razor. Even music cult figure Har Mar Superstar makes a cameo as coach of the Fight Attendants.

The movie packs in quite a few real-life star roller girls in non-starring roles. Ironically, most of these skaters were chosen from Detroit, Grand Rapids and Kalamazoo — Michigan leagues where the principal photography took place instead of the the Austin-banked track stars where the movie takes place.

A scene with the Hurl Scouts from Vincent Pictures film, Whip It, in theaters now.

Everyone familiar with the Women’s Flat Track Derby Association rulebook was probably hearing the shrill blasts of a referee’s whistle in their heads throughout the film, as some of the maneuvers — while entertaining and unusual — were still highly illegal. But hey, it’s a movie. Overall, I give the flick two thumbs up for fun. I thought the humor was a little strained, and the goofy love story didn’t move me. Then again, last time I checked I wasn’t a teenage girl.

After the movie let out, I lingered in the lobby and asked some Bruisers reps who they’d like to see portray them in a big Hollywood production. Shevil Knevil Terror Lapinski would like to see her part played by comedienne Jennifer Coolidge, best-known as Stifler’s mom in American Pie and for roles in several of Christopher Guest’s movies like Best in Show. Maiden Milwaukee Nukly R. Assault would like Terms of Endearment star Shirley MacLaine to portray her on the big screen and Rushin’ Rollette Pound Anya opts for edgy outsider actress Clea DuVall, star of  But I’m a Cheerleader and Girl, Interrupted.

Rushin Rollette Carrie A. Hacksaw and Head Ref Machete Holiday were stumped by the question; I would suggest Natalie Portman for Miss Hacksaw, and Craig … Daniel Craig, for Mr. Machete. (Hey, why don’t other Bruisers and personnel reading this say who they’d like see portray them in the comments section below. Fun times!)

As for this reporter, if I were to get a small role in Bruisers: The Movie I’d like to see it filled by my celebrity twin, Iggy Pop.

The scene at Ridge Cinemas. Photos by Brian Jacobson.